Beyond the Hype : I’m a Walking Disasters

Okay so my title is a little weird and vague, confusing and stupid, and may even deserve some scratches in the head, but it does mean something. When people look at me they see something extraordinary, specie, and a short, handsome, funny, kid – and they would be idiots not to notice that. Right now, beyond the hype I am a walking disaster. Lately, being consumed in so many different things has detered me from devoting more time to making videos, which has made me do more thinking than actually doing.

So what I’ve been thinking about lately is where I want this video project to be headed. I definitely want to continue want to continue making videos even when the class is over in addition to maintaining my blog – I’ve gone somewhat accustomed to having it be a part of my everyday life (kind of). Something I’m thinking of doing is a couple of spontaneous videos – sometimes the most random piece of junk may be gold. The good thing about spontaneous videos is that it can be really funny, if not I could just delete the damn thing.

Another idea I’ve been thinking of doing is an interview with Mr. Burell. Like my role models Stephan Colbert, David Letterman, and Craig Ferguson (some role models eh?) I want to be really really really really rud but at the same time be somewhat respectful to my guest (impossible is nothing). I want to do this behind the green screen, so by the time I do this interview I have to find how to do the mysterious chroma key while also finding a suitable background. For Mr. Burell I want this to be unscripted, while I hold in my hands the mind – blowingly ridiculous questions. This has to be funny so I plan on adding some more sophisticated twists later, hehehehehehe.

I’ve also been thinking about what to do if I have international correspondents invading my show. I was thinking that since the presidential elections is so huge in the U.S at the moment I was thinking of having a CNN type of news cast with the correspondents somehow messing up. If that somehow does not go as planned I could always green screen as a replacement background.

So because I will continue to make more videos even when the class is over, these are some ideas I plan flirting with. Although not everything is set in stone, I want to do at least one of the two fore-mentioned wacky ideas before the last day of school. How? I have no friggin’ idea, but I will figure it out – I always do. Anyway, one thing I realized while embarking on this god forsaken project is that being funny is not as easy as it sounds. One reason my production has been so slow is because – yes, I am somewhat of a perfectionist but I also don’t want to upload some random crud on my youtube channel, because in the long run I value quality over quantity.

Given the topic of my project is probably very ambitious (maybe the most in the class, I don’t know you be the judge) I think in a way I am put too much burden on my shoulders. I’ve been trying too hard to be funny when I needed to do is sit back and talk my genius brain off (I think I’m a borderline genius by the way, I’ve come to that conclusion a loooooooooong time ago . I want to make people happy because in the end, that’s what this project is all about. Not the grades, not the stress, but the people. I try not to forget that.

(Try) Using a Brain that Doesn’t Work – 4.24.08

When was the first time you heard something funny? Don’t remember? I thought so. You failed the first test. Do you know what ajummas mean? You do?! You failed again. Am I failure? Yes, no? If you said yes, you passed and if you said no, you think too highly of me. I failed, which is shocking for me because I’m the type of kid who cries at a B, but I learned something which will somewhat compensate my failures. So basically I’m not panicking as I would normally do or pressing the self-destruct button (not yet anyway).

Well, I think that while uploading my video I ran into my first major obstacle. Copyright. I used an excerpt from a song in my video, and while its only a small portion of it Mr. Burell is giving me a hard time about it nonetheless . I’ve been researching frantically trying to find some sort of loophole and I’ve noticed how messed up the whole process is. Anyway, I found that there is a clause called fair use, which allows the user to use the owner’s material without their consent. One can determine if their use of copyrighted material goes under fair use by applying five factors. Even though I could argue that my use of my song could fall into the fair use, I could be faced with additional scrutiny because I’m not American (the irony of it all). So my options are slim.

I could make my own music, which in my opinion had its goods and bads. The good would be that I would be original and unique compared to other videos. But the bads are plenty. One I would be consumed in making music which would deprive me of the time I devote to making my videos. Another is that it might just be dreadful and the audience will quickly navigate away from the page. But I’m going to give GarageBand a shot, because the Apple nerds have a thing for making quality programs. My second alternative is finding a website which allows use of uncopyrighted music, much like Creative Commons. This would be the logical way but the quality could be second tier. My third option would be not using any music at all, which is a horrible option because it makes my video look horrible.

While I admit my production is not what I had expected at this point in time, I do have visions of a greater future. Okay, I just sounded like some kind of wacko fortune teller but I think I want to pursue a new sense of direction. One thing I want to do before the semester is over is have international correspondents do some cameos in my video. Although this was an idea Mr. B is suggesting for a while I need to get a flow of what I want to do before I start doing anything unique. Another, video I have been wanting to do for some time is doing an interview with Mr. B. The purpose of this interview is basically twofold – one is to show how rude and funny I can be as an interviewer, and the other is to raise awareness of Mr. B’s plan to networktizilate the entire world. Because I actually have goals in this video, I want to make this video after I actually get a little fame.

While my big mouth really speaks louder than my actions, I put a lot of burden on my shoulders. I have run into some unexpected obstacles, things that made me think. This isn’t easy. Expect the unexpected. Learn from your failures. Famous people are famous for a reason (except Paris Hilton). I try not to rush myself because, quite frankly, I prefer quality over quantity something that may make me look like a perfectionist. While my production value is not as high as I had hoped it would be, time has really not been on my side. I know that sounds horrible, selfish, and absolutely dreadful but it is the truth. While I certainly can’t take back all the time I devoted to something else, this month (I swear to God) is going to be different. So sit back and relax while watching the Won train do his magic.

Right now I am trying to figure out how to use a non – copyrighted music downloading site, obtained via Creative Commons, OWL Music Search. What this site basically does is, it lets me find the type of music I want by uploading similar music and selecting a portion of the song I want to find and then clicking search. It’s as confusing as it is painful. Although this site may save me from long hours of making music through GarageBand, it may also be the death of me.

Okay so this blog post, may seem in a my last desperate last ditch attempt to kinda boost up my grade up even a slightly teeny weeny bit. Well, you kind of guessed right. Although my production is not eye – poppingly amazing, it’s not like I slacked off. I want an ‘A’ and quite frankly I think I deserve it. Up to this month I have penned two (and a half) scripts, recorded two (and a half) videos, set up a YouTube account (one subscriber, my friend but yeah!!!) written two blog posts, and done a mountain of research (copyright, subscription info, how to get famous, green screen (which by the way I haven’t found except Ebay…..), and other bits of information that may prove to be crucial on my road to Hollywood). Looking over my progress report I actually did more this month then all the other months. Considering I had a play, a total of four tests, getting off the wait list, and juggling all of my other classes, I really haven’t devoted as much time to Advanced Multimedia and Writing (I guessed that’s what they call it now) as I would have liked. This is not the best news because, in part, I enjoy this class, I really, really do (this is not one of my feeble attempts to get an ‘A’). Although it’s been a rough ride, this class lets me express myself in ways I want to, to be quote honest – it’s a sanctuary from the horrors of high school. Mr. Burell is a school teacher who taught me more than school. He taught me the internet is not just games and social networking, but if you look hard enough it can be a community of individuals who come together under a shared interest. He criticized me (sometimes harshly….) nut only wanted me to succeed. And he taught me that school is not only a place for textbooks and boring essays but is actually a place for you to learn. Just the other day, Mr. Burell called me a smartass after reading my two lines of my blog post. I’ll take that as a compliment because dumbasses get nowhere.

Goals For the Month of May -

-Upload some videos (giving an exact number is not an effective goal, end up only limiting myself)

-Get back on Twitter and start engaging

-Pen some funny scripts

-Have at least one product a week (blog post or video)

-Campaign for subscribers (found out a bunch of ideas on how to do that)

-Use the green screen and international correspondents (if we ever get there)

-Fulfill my goals

Lastly, I plan on maintaining my blog with periodic updates, and making videos. I plan on doing this over the summer so this isn’t the end!

Photo Credit – jonwatson , Norma Desmond, ex.libris

I’m a Failure and I’m Proud – My Lame Script

99.9% of YouTube videos go largely unnoticed. 500,000 videos are uploaded everyday, 6.1 million videos in total (which requires 45 terabytes of storage). Those are some pretty scary numbers for a boy whose trying to become a YouTube star. One thing I learned through my extensive research of YouTube was that failures are accepted. Only a handful of videos are successful which means that most of them end up chopped into pieces on the kitchen floor. I learned that by simply being yourself you will be noticed, people tend to try to be someone that they are not, which is sad. Be yourself, love yourself, and fail yourself you’ll learn more.

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(begin with a title page, followed by me lip – syncing a song in a funny manner)

Hello people of Youtube (coughing ‘nerds’). Today I’m gonna open up and talk about things that pi (stop saying) ticks me off. Now in Asia and Europe, Football is big but everywhere else in the world it’s called soccer. There two different things people!!! Wake up!!! Soccer is the sport where people kick a freakin’ white and black ball and Egyptian referees issue red cards (imitate referee). Football is where 400-pound gorillas wrestle midgets who are trying to throw the ball to the other side, and referees issue yellow ‘flags’ (throw a flag at the camera). I also hate to play soccer. It’s a pointless sport. Seriously! You go up and down the field sideways punch a few guys here and there insult their mothers, punch them again. Oh yeah, there is a goal every 30 minutes! I mean when I play I go this way, that way, and that way and there is no score! I mean it’s like a marathon in circles. There is absolutely no point in that. Nada. None. I also suck, but that has nothing to do with this. Now another thing that really makes me pi – ticked off is the term “government”. I mean I think that they’re doing a fantastic job, especially those in the states (mischievous grin). The name really pi – ticks me off. (laughing) Why do I keep doing that?!?! I mean the term government, if taken literally mean people who govern, not people who stay in their mansion, that are paid for by our tax monies, drink beer and get drunk, go to clubs, have their faces stamped on the headlines of newspapers for doing nothing and launch wars on innocent countries – cause that’s not right (wave arms all around the place). I mean when I think of government, I would like to think of people patrolling streets bossing people around. “Timmy don’t eat the green stuff coming out of the dog!” “Timmy, John McCain(‘s hair) is not a toy!” “Jimmy! Get off of Timmy!” (Laugh) Imagine George Bush doing that! But in all seriousness, if the government just do their job I wouldn’t complain…… a lot. I would like also to extend my congratulations to Paris Hilton, whose has found a new boyfriend…..s. I really have nothing else to talk about………. I ate eggs in the morning……… How do you like your eggs in the morning? Comment below, thanks for watching.

Roads of Glory

This is a transcript of my first youtube video, which I hope will launch me into fame and fortune. If you don’t know already know (which you probably don’t) I want to be a youtube sensation, which is not impossible, but simply friggin’ hard. I hope you get a few laughs reading the script and if you don’t, it means you have no sense of humor.

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Good morning everybody, and if your Americans good afternoon – if your from Europe this show is not for you. Now this is my debut in Youtube, aside from some videos my teacher made me do – don’t go searching for them, the youtube nerds deleted them. Now to begin I am going to tell you frankly – I wanna be famous. Hey if Paris Hilton could be famous for doing nothing why can’t I? That phrase is starting to get cliché.
Now in the midst of the recent presidential election it would be idiotic of me not to talk about it. The incumbent just makes me laugh…. Anyway lets start with the Democratic Presidential Primaries where Monica Lewinsky’s boyfriend’s wife is going against the tough Barack Obama. Now they are in tight tight, tight, neck and neck race. Now if one of them becomes president it is going to be difficult for people to adjust because the current president is so funny and neither of them is well – they are had to make fun of. I can imagine Hilary in the White House (sobbing) “My fellow Americans I – I – I’m so sorry whaaaaaaaaaaaaa!!! I dated Matthew Lewinsky!!!” And the approval ratings will go kablamooo! (up, in reference to her NH win). And Mr. Obama will make one of his memorable speeches “my fellow Americans, we are bombing Iraq, because we’re America” I don’t know?!?! Now I like Obama because I don’t like Hilary, just something about her. (funny hand gestures). Anyway I have a gut feeling that one of them is going to become the next President, just because FOX News tells me to think that way. That’s where I get my news!!! Now moving on to the Republican side of the primaries Mr. John McCain leads the nomination thing. Let’s get a picture over there – oooooooooh…. Slap a beard on him kind of looks like Santa Claus – or the KFC grandpa. Anyway he’s opposed by Mike Huckabee, who is not going to be able to win the race because it is “mathematically impossible”. He responded to the pundits, cynics, doubters, and me by saying “I didn’t major in math, I majored in miracles.” Last time I checked he didn’t major in miracles……… he majored in something else. Unless your name is Jesus… Now I’ve been doing some research on this guy – THANK YOU WIKIPEDIA!!! – and he’s jobless… I know! He was the “former” governor of Arkansas. I hope he’s not homeless. I mean I bet like one day the man as going house shopping and thought of the idea of living in the White House. I mean like “honey how bout the White House” and she says “Okay!!!”. And there’s the other guy Ron Paul – I feel sorry for him. The man is one hundred seventy eight years old, rumored to be older. I bet Jesus was in his yearbook. The man look like your cranky old teethless grandpa – not your president, I mean compared to him Ronald Reagen looks like a Britney Spears – when she shaved her head. Now before I close my segment let me say something – remember to tip your taxi driver.

Photo Credit – sadashiva